Pune, July 8, 2020: After marrying twice to the same husband, a Pune-based 40-year-old woman finds herself at the receiving end of a divorce for the second time. The first time, her husband who is a computer engineer by profession had pronounced triple talaq in 2019.
The woman who is a teacher of literature at a private institute in Pune, on condition of anonymity shared her story with Punekarnews.in After 12 years of relationship, the couple had got married without consent from their families in 2018. “Ours was a love marriage. Although his family knew about me. I was like a family friend to them. I would attend all their functions, go out with his sisters for shopping. We always shared a cordial relation with each other. But they opposed our strictly marriage. My family was also not in our favour. I lost contact with my parents. I still can’t go back to my family,” she said.
“In our 12 years relationship, he had never raised voice on me. I had supported his education, both under-graduation and post-graduation. His father was a scrap dealer and their business wasn’t running well. So I would fund his college fees and the extra computer classes. He would also say he wanted to marry me and have a good future,” she added.
However, her dreams came crushing after they got married. She observed behaviourial changes in her husband. The woman alleged that her mother-in-law and elder sister-in-law along with a neighbour have been trying to influence him against her because of their age-difference. “I met my husband through a common friend when he was in Std XII. We became friends. He was aware of our age difference. I am older than him by six years. I had hesitated our relationship initially, but he persuaded it. He said it doesn’t matter, and that he loves me and wants to settle down with me,” narrated the woman. But, all of this seems to be fake promises now, stated the woman. “He has emotionally, physically, and financially used me,” she added stating that his family is trying to get him married again.
Dispute with the family and raging arguments and misunderstandings between the couple had led to their first divorce, which he had given through talaq-e-biddat (instant triple talaq). However, after a series of counseling in the presence of a common relative, he had also realised that his action would lead him to jail punishment, as matter of triple talaq was being heard at the apex court and discussed in parliament. So he agreed to get married again, but on a condition of Halala. They got married again on March 2, 2020. On April 6, the woman was subjected to domestic violence. “He beat me up badly that day and left the house. For a month I was trying to convince him and kept apologising, but all in vain. He sent me a notice of divorce on June 17 (not a court notice),” said the woman.
Explaining the nature of the divorce, Muslim Satyashodhak Mandal’s Shamshuddin Tamboli said, “he is now trying to give divorce through Talaq-e-Hasan. Even though, now triple talaq is banned, Muslim men have other mediums to give divorce out of court. In this form of divorce, the man will give a written letter stating divorce to the woman and after a gap of one month, he will send a second letter and then again a third letter, sealing the divorce after three letters. This form of divorce has not been addressed yet by the government or judiciary.” He also added, “it appears that the husband was aware of her financial stability, as she is a teacher. And he has tried to benefit through it. Now refused to accept her and trying to get married to another woman.”
Tamboli said, “we have been continuously demanding that not only triple talaq but also other forms of divorce which don’t involve court laws should be banned. If a case of divorce has to be filed, then it should be at the court– where the woman will also have the right to speak and defend herself.” The social activist was approached by the woman recently, Tamboli informed that he is trying to counsel her husband, but he isn’t ready to budge.
The woman also stated that the police refused to lodge a complaint of domestic violence stating it as ‘personal matter of husband and wife.’ She will look for legal ways to seek justice and deny this illegal divorce.
To add to her problems, the owner of the rented house where the couple lived told her, they couldn’t accommodate a woman who lives alone. So she had to shift to her relative’s house and has been staying there for the last 2 months. “You can see how people perceive a woman who is a divorcee or single in our society. I fear security now. People are questioning me, I am being judged for the broken marriage. They are saying I might have some flaws because of which he left. I don’t see the reason for only I being accused of this when he did all the wrong things to me. I believe it is difficult for a woman to live in this patriarchal society especially when the husband claims a divorce,” she said.
Punekar News has contacted her husband to know his side. This report will be updated after getting his response.Follow Punekar News: